img_4481-2

Too Much Information! 

Motherhood is beautiful. I thank God every day for the ability to bring my sweet little girls to life, especially when so many women are praying for this opportunity. But, there are definitely some experiences that come with pregnancy and post-partum life that are honestly not all that pretty and I don’t think we talk about them enough. As a new mom with Diari, I experienced so many changes and struggles post-partum that made me mad because I was like, “why didn’t anyone tell me my nipples are going to blister or that my vagina was going to tear??” This post isn’t meant to make you uncomfortable. It’s to help us all see that a lot of these struggles are normal; it’s to help the new mom reading this know that she’s not alone; and it’s to show everyone else what we go through. So this post will be TMI (Too Much Information) but I promise it’ll help with understanding and adjusting to post-partum life.

img_4480-1

Post-Partum TMIs

  • Whether or not you’re lucky enough not to have vaginal tearing, you’re gonna go home and you’re gonna be bleeding. And it’s more than just period bleeding. You just had a baby so even after you push everything out, there can be flesh-like discharge that comes with your blood. You will probably have accidents, which makes you feel like you’re back in middle school. So make sure you stock up on granny panties, adult underwear, and even diapers because I definitely had some close calls (I put a towel down everywhere I sat or lied down because I was afraid to make a mess). Oh, and the stitches from tearing are painful AF. You can’t sneeze in peace without peeing yourself. Pray you don’t get constipated because you’ll basically tear all over again.
  • Waking up to milk leakage from your boobs is no fun but it will happen, so just keep using the breast pads and pump as soon as you feel like you need it. There will be a lot of discomfort around that so make sure you also use nipple balm to ease the pain. I ended up with blisters around my nipples (and it hurt like no other) until I started using the nipple balm. 
  • You will wake up sometimes with pain (feeling like your stitches came out, but they usually haven’t). Your lady parts can feel like they are on fire and the stomach cramps aren’t any better. The first poop can hurt like hell (God forbid you become constipated). Definitely stay on top of those stool softeners.
  • You will stink: yes, you read that right – YOU WILL STINK. No matter how clean you are, you are covered in blood and leaking so don’t beat yourself too much over the smell. Just change your pads as much as you can and take a few showers a day if you are up to it but let’s be honest, you probably won’t be just because you’re a NEW MOM and THAT’S OKAY! So stink away, mamas! 
  • Discoloration is real. Surprisingly, I didn’t have any stretch marks or discoloration until I went into labor or gave birth both times. The first time, I looked into the mirror and not only did I gain tiger stripes post-partum, but my stomach and hips area looked like 50 different shades (I’m only exaggerating a little bit).

img_4486-1

Baby TMIs – Don’t Freak Out! 

FYI, while us moms are experiencing our own changes, there’s actually a lot of stuff that happens with the babies’ bodies too that isn’t common knowledge. For women who have baby girls, there could be a possibility that you see milk coming out of the baby’s nipples. Also, baby girls can have little periods. And they can have clear discharge, so don’t freak out if you take her diaper off and see or feel it. It’s not common, but it is normal. It’s crazy! These are facts that most of us don’t know, so just avoid freaking out and seek advice from your doctor and other moms you trust.

img_4485

Post-Partum Emotions

Lastly and most importantly, crying and mood swings are okay. This is not a “TMI” but sometimes I don’t think we get to feel our post-partum feelings the way we want to. Your emotions can be all over the place after labor. From waking up angry to crying for no reason… it’s normal, it’s the post-partum hormones. Just watch for it because if it continues then you may be experiencing postpartum depression (which is REAL!) and it’s okay. Just talk to someone and seek help. You are not alone. Remember to be kind to yourself and know that this too shall pass.

img_4481-1

Post-Partum Lessons Learned

What are some things you wish you had known before you gave birth about post-partum life? Share some of your best post-partum advice in the comments to help other mamas out! 

18 Comments

  1. Mariama
    April 10, 2019 / 1:29 pm

    1st of all congrats again on baby #2. There is so much truth in this that I wish someone had told me when I had junior 4 years ago. When I had zahra( my 1st girl) 7months ago, the doc was kind of enough to tell me she might have discharge and I shouldn’t freak out, that helped me a lot cuz I had no idea that was possible. Thank u for sharing this

    • April 10, 2019 / 2:07 pm

      Thank you, sis! It’s so good to know that others can relate. These experiences can be so scary when you don’t have all the information. May Allah bless Junior and Zahra (I love her name, by the way)!

  2. A
    April 10, 2019 / 2:06 pm

    Aicha, I think you inadvertently contributed to natural birth control with this post! LOL. Ironically, I was cracking up when I was reading your post because though it isn’t funny (now) you look back on those years, laugh and pat yourself on the back for surviving that period. I wish I had known how challenging breastfeeding will/can be – I insisted on exclusive breastfeeding and little did I know that it comes with a lot of finesse and planning especially when you’re a working mom.

    • April 10, 2019 / 2:10 pm

      Exactly!! It’s always funny looking back! This post was fun to write because I was just randomly talking to my cousin (who loves kids but doesn’t have kids yet) about some of this and she was SO freaked out! I mean it can really be shocking because we don’t talk about it. So even though it’s worth it in the long run, it’s definitely a struggle when you’re in it. Congrats on getting through, sis!

  3. Aicha B
    April 10, 2019 / 2:35 pm

    Love this post! Thanks for sharing Aicha 💕I just had baby #2 a week ago so it’s nice to know that someone else is going through similar changes as I.

    • April 10, 2019 / 2:37 pm

      Congratulations, sis!! How exciting! It’s always good to know you’re on this journey with other mamas.

  4. Fembeaut
    April 10, 2019 / 3:11 pm

    Amazing… I really enjoyed this so much lesson learnt

    • April 10, 2019 / 3:24 pm

      That is great, Fembeaut! There’s so much we can learn from each other when we share our stories. Thanks for reading!

  5. Amina
    April 10, 2019 / 4:11 pm

    You are such a beautiful soul. May Allah bless you and your beautiful family. I wish I knew all this before having my son. Africans (fulani mothers) don’t get into details because they don’t wanna scare you. Lol thank you for sharing sis.

    • April 10, 2019 / 10:04 pm

      Ameena and thanks for reading, sis! You’re right, a lot of this is kept secret as if we’re not gonna find out eventually. My philosophy is that it’s better to know in advance so I’m spilling all the tea! Lol

  6. Mariam
    April 10, 2019 / 5:10 pm

    Waou!! Now im all the way freaked out lol… Expecting my first and this has opened up a lot of articles that I will read to get the in depth on all the information you shared. Thanks 😊

    • April 10, 2019 / 10:07 pm

      Congratulations, Mariam!! And don’t be too scared because now that you know, you can get ready for it! Honestly, it’s all worth it when you see their beautiful little faces. Best of luck, sis!

  7. Salimatu
    April 10, 2019 / 5:33 pm

    I love it. As real and it gets. Being a mom is not easy

    • April 10, 2019 / 10:08 pm

      Thanks, Salimatu! Motherhood really is not all hugs and kisses so I’m hoping that we can talk about this stuff more openly.

  8. Kadiatou
    April 10, 2019 / 6:17 pm

    Real talk sis, I wish someone alerted me with this 4years ago I felt like crap.Specialy that constipation lol 😂 no joke at all.I said to hubby no more babies 👶.But 2years later another one came and I was depressed with the second one but thanks God To my hubby and Dad I survived it.Thank you for sharing this experience.

    • April 10, 2019 / 10:11 pm

      Thank you so much for sharing about your post-partum depression, Kadiatou. I’m so sorry you experienced that and I’m happy that you made it through. It’s a really hard but true issue that so many of us deal with, sometimes without even realizing it. I’m impressed that hubby and Dad were the ones who helped you through it, applause to them. Congrats on your two little ones <3

  9. Chrisney
    April 11, 2019 / 1:34 pm

    You know I so do love you and the girls!!! I am glad that you wrote this blog… there are a lot of us out there that needed to hear… “It’s OK” and “You are not alone.” I feel that it’s really good to surround yourself around new and not-so-new moms so that you can get the real deal and not just what the doctors tell you. Continued blessings to you and the family. love you much!

    • April 11, 2019 / 2:56 pm

      Agreed, mama! It’s seriously a struggle to go through it blindfolded and alone. I remember how scared I felt with baby #1. Sometimes I STILL look at them and think, “Am I doing this right?” Then I remember that I am loving them and teaching them the best way I know how and I am raising sweet, happy, health babies. We have to give ourselves more credit. There’s no “right” way to do any of this. All we can do is our very best. Thanks for being part of my mommy tribe, Chrisney <3

Leave a Reply


Looking for Something?