Here’s What’s New with Me: Life Changes and Tips

New Me

What’s New, What’s Changed?

We have finally gotten away from 2020 and walking into the new year can feel like a fresh start. But a lot of times, it also means it’s own set of challenges or even some of the same ones from the year before. For me, I’m going through a lot of changes but I’m also having some new opportunities. So I just wanted to share what’s new and how I’m balancing all of my responsibilities with my goals.

Juggling Life, Babies, Parents and Work

One of the biggest changes with my life right now is that my mom is living with me. I’ve been trying for years to move her out of New York because she was working too much and she was getting sicker. Finally, I was able to convince her and I’m so happy I did. She’s not feeling well so she has lot doctors appointments with different specialists.

Of course, this is an extra responsibility because I’m taking care of my mom and taking care of the kids that are growing at the same time. Sometimes it can be really stressful. I’m also working from home, trying to work on my own passion projects on the side, and cooking and cleaning. So there’s a lot of aspects of my life that I’m trying to manage. I know a lot of people who are juggling some of these same changes too so here are some tips that have helped me.

Tips:

  • Find your parents a device, whether it’s a smartphone, a tablet, or both. It can be a good way to distract them and help them stay connected with other people. My mom is able to spend a lot of her time calling friends and family or watching one her shows on her iPad. This gives me some space and flexibility where she’s not always coming to me because she’s bored.
  • Create a link between your kids and your parents. Think of fun activities they can do together like games they can play. Even if it means getting them some cards or books to read together. Let them entertain each other sometimes and bond.
  • Keep some healthy snacks at home. For the parents, the kids, and even for yourself.

Staying Healthy: The New OMAD Diet

On top of everything I have on my plate, of course I’m trying to stay healthy too. Ever since my first pregnancy, my body hasn’t been total in my control. And it’s normal, especially as we get older our bodies go through changes, our metabolism slows down, and we have to work harder to stay fit. So I’ve tried a few different plans and right now I’m on another round of the OMAD diet. OMAD stands for One Meal A Day. It’s basically fasting for 23 hours and eating your entire meal in 1 hour of the day. The nice thing about OMAD is that it doesn’t tell you what to eat or how much. It gives your body the freedom to decide. Of course, I try to pack in as many nutritious foods into that one meal as I can.

OMAD is not just about losing weight; it’s also a good way to learn discipline. A lot of times We eat because we’re bored not because we’re hungry (and I love food) so OMAD has been teaching me to manage those cravings and stress eating. Plus, it’s nice because I don’t have to worry about what I’m going to eat every few hours!

Exercising is the hard part. I try when I can get it in but unfortunately that’s not all the time because of everything on my plate. After working my 9-to-5, I have to choose between working out, answering emails, or going to bed super late (which is my norm). Instead, I try to make it all work together by eating well, drinking a lot of water, exercising when I can, and meditating.

Tips

  • If you can’t find time to exercise, that’s okay. A lot of times what we eat is more important anyway. So just try to stay consistent with how and what you eat instead.
  • Drink a lot of water. I know we hear this all the time but you can make it easier to do if you buy a big enough water bottle. You can keep it with you all the time. Don’t buy a whole gallon jug because that can get heavy and you get tired of holding it. Buy a half gallon and fill it again if you need more water.
  • If you want to try OMAD, I highly recommend it! Just make sure it won’t impact your health, do your research, and give your body the flexibility it needs.

Financial Health

Financial is such an important part of your overall mental (and even physical) health. I don’t believe that “‘money doesn’t buy happiness” because it does buy security, peace of mind, and freedom to live life how you want. If that’s not happiness, I don’t know what is lol. But really, it goes a long way. So it’s really important to learn about money, how to grow it, how to save it, and how to responsibly spend it. I’m always looking for new ways to do all of this. I met some major savings and debt repayment goals I set for myself last year. So now I’m working on avoiding the same cycle of debt. I have set my financial goals for the year and here’s what I recommend:

Tips

  • Know how much you owe and make a plan to lower your debt (if you can right now). If you can’t lower your debt because of this stressful time, that’s okay. A lot of people don’t know if you call some of these companies, they can postpone your payments, cancel your interest payment for the month, or even negotiate your debt owed (although that does impact your credit so research first).
  • Set financial goals and a budget. Where is your money coming from, and more importantly, where is it going? You might be might be surprised how much of your paycheck Target is keeping lol (cause I know they have mine)!
  • Start a savings. Today. Even if it’s $10, it’s a savings. One of my favorite financial gurus (@zerobasedbudget) breaks down Emergency Fund savings into three categories. Bare Bones Savings ($1,000), Starter Emergency Fund (One month of necessary living expenses), and Fully Funded Emergency Fund (3-6 months of living expenses). Where can you start?
  • Start investing if you can. I didn’t start investing in stocks until a few weeks ago because I have always been under the impression that you needed a lot of money to invest. Now I’ve learned that that is just not true. I do of course suggest you know exactly what you are doing before getting in. So I started using B224 Capital to help understand which stocks to buy, at what rates, when to pull out, etc. This service has allowed me to understand how trading works a little better and I’m fully in control of what I decide to purchase.

Controlling What Affects You

Last, I want to talk about what we let control us. I’ve learned that when someone engages with you in a way that makes you want to engage back negatively, we tend to get into that dangerous back-and-forth, whether it’s on social media or in person. With all of the changes happening around us right now, political, public health, Black Lives Matter policy demands, there is so much stress circulating. People will come for you and they will try you. I’m a hothead so my initial reaction is always to jump off lol. But instead we can learn to let things roll off our back without paying it too much mind. As hard as it seems, we have to for our own mental health. Because every time we engage, we’re giving someone our energy, our time, and our health. That’s too expensive of a price to pay.

Tips

  • Log off of social media or set a time limit for yourself if it’s too much. I know iPhone will let you set a reminder when you’ve been on social media longer than the time limit you set.
  • Delete, block, or MUTE people as you need to. Don’t feel bad about distancing yourself from toxicity. You don’t have to LIKE everyone you love, and more importantly, you can love people from afar.
  • Find what works for you when you get heated. Is it meditating? Is it music? Or is it running? Whatever it is, tap into that and change your response to anger.
Change
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2 Comments

  1. Sekina Bamfo
    January 27, 2021 / 6:56 pm

    Thanks for sharing such wisdom! I needed to hear this post today. Let me also commend you for your hardwork and taking care of your Mom, it’s a blessing! I appreciate you for sharing am inspired🙏🏾

  2. Teeedun
    January 27, 2021 / 7:20 pm

    I enjoyed reading about what’s new about you, it’s so inspiring and the truth, I have learned a lot. Thanks for the inspiration. Love u and the gals

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